Blog post,  Encouragement,  Life,  Opinion

Finding Calm During Times of Uncertainty

April 5, 2020

Your hand opens and closes, opens and closes. If it were always a fist or always stretched open, you would be paralyzed. Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding, the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated as birds’ wings.

—Rumi

Update: Feb 2023 — The following publication may have been written in the early-ish days of COVID, the principals of personal practices are timeless. Do with this information, these examples as you wish. Thank you for reading! —Terry xx

Lovelies, may this reflection find you well, especially during such unique and challenging times. While doing everything within our power to be well, stay safe, care for others and cope with unusual stressors, more now than ever it’s important to find a sense of balance — to calm and quiet our fears.

For all the unknowns faced collectively as a society, we are most assuredly surrounded by wondrous, beautiful blessings. Redirecting our thoughts away from current challenges to acknowledge even the smallest of precious gifts and joy in our lives, is a practice we humans should actively embrace. Even if the sun appears hidden and grayness of storms loom, taking a moment (or several, each day) to allow our thoughts to calm — to focus only on the good — could be one of the healthiest exercises we do for ourselves. Being grateful for the blessing of a new day, a new gift, seems like a great place to begin! (merely my opinion)

[bctt tweet=”Even if the sun appears hidden and grayness of storms loom, taking a moment to allow our thoughts to calm — to focus only on the good — could be one of the healthiest exercises we do for ourselves. —tmm”]

In a previous reflection, I razzed healthy peeps (in jest, mostly) that everyone needed to ‘suck it up’ with respect to life adjustments implemented (early on) at the hands of COVID-19. Truth be had, various government mandates — lockdowns, social distancing, wearing a mask, combined with heartbreaking loss of innocent lives and coping with economic stresses — have created tremendous angsts. (to say the least) Add in social unrest, violent riots and political madness… our country (globally) has been/is in crisis. 2020 has been a bad dream/nightmare… that we’ve been living and witnessing in real time.

We may not be in control of what happens outside of our “safe spaces”, we can control our thoughts and how we cope. We can choose calm over chaos and fear.

The real skinny… our kids. They feel all of the coronavirus-crisis-confusion: months in lockdown and virtual “learning”; experts preaching early on that “only healthcare providers needed to wear masks“… to “everyone needs to wear a mask in public.” The rules and guidelines continue to change to this day. And as unsettling as all of this has been for adults, sadly, our children have been innocently caught in the fray.

Definitely continuing to pray for the safety and well-being of our children, educators, ‘essential’ workers and all humans as we move forward. Learning to co-exist with this coronavirus is an active and very real part of daily life. Living in a protective bubble isn’t going to happen! (would be nice though, right?!)

[bctt tweet=”We may not be in control of what happens outside of our “safe spaces”, we can choose calm over chaos and fear.—tmm”]

How Do We Find Balance and Calm?

Finding balance, welcoming calm in to help quiet the chaos, is absolutely necessary. If we wish to stay sane (relatively speaking). Goodness knows balance and inner calm aren’t necessarily easily achieved.

Like so many, especially invisible illness peeps, I’ve become quite familiar with ‘coping’. More specifically, coping with: “things out of one’s control due to illness and personal crisis“ — life unexpectedly up-ended due to loss of income, confined to the same four walls day in and day out, no definitive timeline for when out-of-one’s-control shhhtuff may end and return to “normal” — plus the rollercoaster of emotions that come with, for added “fun”.

So, when life-altering occurrences happen — uncertainties and unknowns are front and center, daily — how do we find balance and instill a sense of calm?

Good question, right?!

I’ve been trying to perfect the “coping, finding balance, achieving internal peace and calm during times of uncertainty” part of life for decades. Sincerely wish I knew the magical seven steps!

Stating the obvious here, but I know firsthand that finding balance during bumpy times takes constant effort. My go-tos for help: faith, family, fur babies (comfort companions), self-care, nature + grounding, and hope.

Wait a minute. I believe I just identified my “seven steps”!

Seven Magical Factors to Finding Balance and Inner Calm

Perhaps a smidge of sarcasm with the term ‘magical’, as I’m quite certain zero magic is involved in ‘finding balance’. Nonetheless, these seven-ish behaviors, practices, factors in my life, absolutely help keep me together. Well, quasi together. Ok, as “together” as I’m probably going to be! (lol + acceptance of my here and now)

Faith

Religion, spirituality, one’s faith — all quite personal. Having faith is to believe and to trust. My beliefs and spiritual prayer provide the purest sense of inner calm. Whether expressing gratefulness for even the tiniest, yet abundant blessings, or sobbing, pleading for relief from daily health struggles — leaning on and into my faith, saves me… over and over again.

Whatever your beliefs, I pray you have faith and a Higher Power helping to guide your path, helping to fill your heart with peace and calm.

Family

Heartbreakingly, not everyone is blessed with a loving, caring, supportive spouse/partner and family. How wonderful, however, that amazing families and communities are woven together by so much more than DNA. Lean on whatever constitutes family, however and whenever needed. Let the support of such family help provide much needed balance when life is out of sorts. (… if the opposite happens, if family drama adds stress to your life, prayers and hope are with you. and maybe look for/create a new family!?)

Fur Babies — Comfort Companions

Frankly, without my fur babies, Junior & Willie, life would be on the bleak side. (no offense intended to the hubs, he knows what I mean) The comfort and companionship our four-legged family members offer is undeniably healing. Occasional heighten stress may come with our furry friends, but in general they bring with them sooo much joy and unconditional love — offsetting life’s rude and ugly stressors. If you’re in a position to adopt, offering a forever home to an animal in need, what a blessing it could be for everyone. (unless your allergic to pet dander, then maybe adopt a fish!)

Self-Care

Mere implication of “self-care” may seem, well, selfish. Furthest from the truth. Self-care is preservation.

self-care: the practice of taking action to preserve or improve one’s own health; the practice of taking an active role in protecting one’s own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress. [Oxford]

Self-care takes on many shapes and sizes, depending upon an individual’s needs. I’m guessing my self-care — necessities to offset miserable flares and/or herxheimer reactions during lyme disease treatments: supplements galore, loads of detoxing, light stretching as able, rest, rest, and more rest — looks a tad different than your needs. (unless you’re fighting Lyme disease or chronic illness as well. we are some self-care party animals!)

Hopefully your self-care experience resembles pure enjoyment and/or relaxation — with maybe cocktails added, just because. Whatever the case, self-care is a must. ‘Just do it!’

Nature + Grounding

Getting out in nature has magical healing and calming properties. Simply opening up the windows offers soothing and healing vibes (for me, anyway). Nature — fresh air, sunshine hitting your skin, the sheer loveliness of Mother Nature’s goodness — yes, please! Get outside as often as life and weather permit.

May your body be kind to you, allowing for all the nature-ing and grounding your heart desires. (take those allergy meds, wear sunscreen, most importantly… check for ticks after!!!)

Get your nature on!

Hope

Hope is an optimistic state of mind that is based on an expectation of positive outcomes with respect to events and circumstances in one’s life or the world at large. [Wikipedia]

Hope is another must for me, for everyone. Without hope we fuel negativity and doubt… and feed chaos. May we push out fear, breathe in the calm, and hold on to hope — hope for all who are sick to recover; hope for guidance and protection over all who are caring for the sick; hope for continued strength as we make our way through these challenging times; hope for cohesiveness as a nation (leaving political posturing aside for the greater good — we the people!); hope for a secure sense of normalcy to return… and soon.

“Nothing should be out of the reach of hope. Life is a hope.”

—Oscar Wilde

[bctt tweet=”Without hope we fuel negativity and doubt… and feed chaos. May we push out fear, breathe in the calm, and hold on to hope— always. —tmm”]

Until my next reflection…

May you find balance and your inner calm during these times of uncertainty and always!

Stay well… and safe… and hopeful, now more than ever.


Hugs from my corner of the universe to yours.

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#FindingBalance #FindYourCalm #Faith #Family #FurBabies #SelfCare #Nature #Grounding #Hope #HoldingOnToHope #coronavirus #COVID19

Over here reflecting about life, illness + healing. Offering encouragement + empathy + support. Sharing smatterings of sarcasm + sass. Oozing with opinion. Speaking my truth. —tmm

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